The Archive Is Alive: Dangerous Names

Between recently attending a baby shower and visiting a friend and her newborn daughter, this post from a few years ago popped into my head this evening. And since I have devoted this week to finishing up illustrations for my upcoming book (woo hoo!!), I decided to call this one up again as my pinch hitter. And since most of my readers now weren’t around when I first posted this, it is very likely new to you.

♦♦♦

So I kind of have baby on the brain lately. I think I probably made my husband stop breathing with that statement, but mostly it is just because I have quite a few friends who are pregnant right now. Bringing new life into the world is filled with all kinds of land mines of excitement and frustration. And picking a name for your new bundle is just one of them.

You know how some names seem to have certain connotations to them? Come on, don’t act all I don’t judge a book by its cover on me. Whether name profiling is right or wrong (okay, it’s most definitely wrong), you know that if you hear of a kid named Bear Blu that his mother is most likely a celebrity, and also likely to chew up her child’s food for him and then spit it into his mouth.

That is why naming a child can be such a stressful thing. I was reminded of this during a conversation with a friend of mine who is expecting her third child. She and her husband seem to be at a standstill in the naming process, mostly because they have trouble agreeing on names that they both like. I can empathize. My husband and I had very few names we agreed upon. In fact, it’s a good thing we have one girl and one boy, because those two names were pretty much the only ones we both liked. If a baby #3 ever comes along, in short…we’re screwed.

In talking with my friend, I also realized that maybe part of the reason choosing a name is so hard is because men and women seem to have different tastes in names. Especially girl names. Let’s just say that both of our husbands had female name choices that hold those certain connotations I was talking about earlier.

nuns
Which one is named Sr. Brandy?

When I became pregnant the first time, Kurt and I each made a list of names we liked, then compared. One of the names that he really liked was Brandy, and when I showed my immediate distaste for it, he just couldn’t understand why. Really? Seriously? What’s one of the first things that comes to mind when you hear that name? My answer: dancer. (And not the kind you pay a lot of money to go see…well, maybe you do. It’s just all in singles. My apologies to all the demure and fully-clothed Brandys of the world. I know there are many of you out there. I am a horrible person.).

Considering that Kurt has made it definitively clear that his ultimate goal for his daughter is that she enter the convent in her teens, I was flabbergasted that he would want to name her Brandy…and that he didn’t like my suggestion of Mary because it was “too plain.” Helloooooo…Mary practically begs to have a Sister placed before it and something like Frances put after it. Mary is a surefire nun name! But Kurt still defended Brandy, saying he liked the name because of the totally rockin’ song by Looking Glass:

I’ll give it to him. I love the song. However, even the song is about a girl who hangs around sailors all the time and thinks it is okay to stay with a guy who would rather get his jollies out at sea than give her the time of day. Needless to say, we found the very acceptable compromise of Grace. And it’s a good thing, because at the age of five, she once said something on the playground that could have been worrisome otherwise. She was sliding down the fireman’s pole and yelled, “Dad, I have really good pole moves! You should see them sometime. Really. I’m really good on the pole.” Knowing that her name means “blessing and virtue” helped me laugh off this comment. Had her name been Brandy, it could have been very ominous.

So, to all my round-bellied friends and anyone else with a bun in the oven, good luck dodging the land mines of dangerous names.

Milk Diaries by Maggie SingletonOh, and while you’re in the market for all things baby-related, check out this kick ass book by my good friend and fantastic writer, Maggie Singleton. It’s called Milk Diaries: A Compilation of Practical, Encouraging Advice from the “Real” Breastfeeding Experts. She has gathered stories from many moms about their experiences breastfeeding, and it is better than any breastfeeding book I ever read as a new mom. You can also check my own contribution in there, “The Lactation Consultant from the Black Lagoon.” Happy reading…and feeding!

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20 thoughts on “The Archive Is Alive: Dangerous Names

  1. I instantly knew which one of you liked Brandy and which one of you didn’t, and I’ve never even met you! (Girls named Brandy are always friends with girls named Misty, Crystal and Amber.)

    Like

  2. Haha I remember this one! Can’t really remember if I commented back then or not. My poor Mr Unprepared kept getting knocked back when he liked names for the Little Mister. I couldn’t stop realising just how many people I’d met in my life that I didn’t like with those names haha.

    Like

    1. Isn’t it the truth? I used to be a teacher, and it was amazing how many names were ruined for me by kids I taught.

      And aw, you ARE one of my first readers that wasn’t related to me! We go back a long time, girl 🙂 Thanks for sticking around!!

      Like

  3. I thought this was hilarious. Names are cool. They are the first thing that symbolizes us to the rest of the world. Kurtis is out of control liking the name “Brandy.” In fact, Autumn, our adopted older cat, was named “Brandy!” We immediately changed it, and although Lisa wonders at time if she really is an “Autumn” (we adopted her five years ago!), we definitely knew we didn’t like “Brandy.” I think that people should be able to be creative with names. Name changes represent a change in life in the Bible. I’m glad I like my name. Kelly, were you always supposed to be Kelly? How did Kurtis get his name? Enjoyed it!

    Like

    1. You do have a good, solid name…and your middle name rocks. I think my dad wanted to name me Susan, and around the age of 5 I wanted to change my name to Dorothy because I loved Wizard of Oz. But all in all, I am pretty happy with Kelly. Especially since I married into such a long last name. Not sure how Kurtis got his name, except that I know his parents really liked the more traditional German names. And I think Autumn definitely suits her. She would have certainly been much friskier if you had kept Brandy.

      But, damn, it is a good song. I’ve been humming it all day!

      Like

  4. We had two boys first and those names were SO easy. I let my husband pick the first one and he used names of his few and far between family members. (Elliot Michael). Then, we both whole-heartedly liked Isaac. It wasn’t special to anything; we just liked it. And I gave him my dad’s name as a middle. But for this third baby – a girl – we had trouble. I gave him a list of 20 names that he vetoed in full. He gave me a list of names, his #1 being Julie – ick, and I vetoed them. Then, one day out of the blue, he asked about Dakota and it stuck!

    Like

  5. I remember arguing over baby names! Hungarian Work Horse wanted to name our oldest daughter Marlena. He was on second shift at the time and watched Days Of Our Lives eating his lunch everyday before he went to work.

    Like

  6. I don’t want to be the sourpuss of these comments but yet, here it comes. Back in the day of my pregnancy, my Ex argued black and blue with me about if it was a boy, his name (I’ll give only initials) AEE – I wanted ACE..I thought Ace sounded much cooler. Well didn’t my ex wait until After I had the epidermal and once He was finally born, Moi couldn’t utter a single word, still feeling the effects and more. My ex then procedded to name Him AEE without my permission. The rest is history as usual♥

    Like

    1. Oh heck no….I would be pissed at him as well. My husband and I may have been annoyed that the other didn’t like a certain name, but neither one of us would ever name the baby something the other hadn’t also greenlighted. That was downright dirty dog stuff there. If anything, the woman might be able to get away with that solely for the reason that she did all the heavy lifting and birthed the baby. I say you have every right to be a sour puss over that!

      Like

  7. This is pretty funny because my wife and I could not agree on names for girls. I think we guys like names that are less common. Luckily, we had three boys and we both love the names we chose. 🙂

    Like

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The Archive Is Alive: Dangerous Names

Between recently attending a baby shower and visiting a friend and her newborn daughter, this post from a few years ago popped into my head this evening. And since I have devoted this week to finishing up illustrations for my upcoming book (woo hoo!!), I decided to call this one up again as my pinch hitter. And since most of my readers now weren’t around when I first posted this, it is very likely new to you.

♦♦♦

So I kind of have baby on the brain lately. I think I probably made my husband stop breathing with that statement, but mostly it is just because I have quite a few friends who are pregnant right now. Bringing new life into the world is filled with all kinds of land mines of excitement and frustration. And picking a name for your new bundle is just one of them. Continue reading “The Archive Is Alive: Dangerous Names”

20 thoughts on “The Archive Is Alive: Dangerous Names

  1. I instantly knew which one of you liked Brandy and which one of you didn’t, and I’ve never even met you! (Girls named Brandy are always friends with girls named Misty, Crystal and Amber.)

    Like

  2. Haha I remember this one! Can’t really remember if I commented back then or not. My poor Mr Unprepared kept getting knocked back when he liked names for the Little Mister. I couldn’t stop realising just how many people I’d met in my life that I didn’t like with those names haha.

    Like

    1. Isn’t it the truth? I used to be a teacher, and it was amazing how many names were ruined for me by kids I taught.

      And aw, you ARE one of my first readers that wasn’t related to me! We go back a long time, girl 🙂 Thanks for sticking around!!

      Like

  3. I thought this was hilarious. Names are cool. They are the first thing that symbolizes us to the rest of the world. Kurtis is out of control liking the name “Brandy.” In fact, Autumn, our adopted older cat, was named “Brandy!” We immediately changed it, and although Lisa wonders at time if she really is an “Autumn” (we adopted her five years ago!), we definitely knew we didn’t like “Brandy.” I think that people should be able to be creative with names. Name changes represent a change in life in the Bible. I’m glad I like my name. Kelly, were you always supposed to be Kelly? How did Kurtis get his name? Enjoyed it!

    Like

    1. You do have a good, solid name…and your middle name rocks. I think my dad wanted to name me Susan, and around the age of 5 I wanted to change my name to Dorothy because I loved Wizard of Oz. But all in all, I am pretty happy with Kelly. Especially since I married into such a long last name. Not sure how Kurtis got his name, except that I know his parents really liked the more traditional German names. And I think Autumn definitely suits her. She would have certainly been much friskier if you had kept Brandy.

      But, damn, it is a good song. I’ve been humming it all day!

      Like

  4. We had two boys first and those names were SO easy. I let my husband pick the first one and he used names of his few and far between family members. (Elliot Michael). Then, we both whole-heartedly liked Isaac. It wasn’t special to anything; we just liked it. And I gave him my dad’s name as a middle. But for this third baby – a girl – we had trouble. I gave him a list of 20 names that he vetoed in full. He gave me a list of names, his #1 being Julie – ick, and I vetoed them. Then, one day out of the blue, he asked about Dakota and it stuck!

    Like

  5. I remember arguing over baby names! Hungarian Work Horse wanted to name our oldest daughter Marlena. He was on second shift at the time and watched Days Of Our Lives eating his lunch everyday before he went to work.

    Like

  6. I don’t want to be the sourpuss of these comments but yet, here it comes. Back in the day of my pregnancy, my Ex argued black and blue with me about if it was a boy, his name (I’ll give only initials) AEE – I wanted ACE..I thought Ace sounded much cooler. Well didn’t my ex wait until After I had the epidermal and once He was finally born, Moi couldn’t utter a single word, still feeling the effects and more. My ex then procedded to name Him AEE without my permission. The rest is history as usual♥

    Like

    1. Oh heck no….I would be pissed at him as well. My husband and I may have been annoyed that the other didn’t like a certain name, but neither one of us would ever name the baby something the other hadn’t also greenlighted. That was downright dirty dog stuff there. If anything, the woman might be able to get away with that solely for the reason that she did all the heavy lifting and birthed the baby. I say you have every right to be a sour puss over that!

      Like

  7. This is pretty funny because my wife and I could not agree on names for girls. I think we guys like names that are less common. Luckily, we had three boys and we both love the names we chose. 🙂

    Like

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