Hey, I Just Bought An Area Rug…And Other Stuff

area rug

You know how sometimes you call up a friend just to say hey? Well, that’s kind of all this is. Hey! I didn’t get a real blog post written this week because I spent too much time binge watching Unbreakable … Continue reading

The Google Search History of a 6-Year-Old Boy

google search history

I’d like to kiss the person who invented internet parental controls. Raising kids in this digital age usually terrifies me. The moment my tween daughter first asked me for her own iPhone without the slightest hint of joking in her … Continue reading

Listen To Your Mother…Or Me. Either One.

AreYouFinishedYet.com (1)

Eat your vegetables. Put on a coat. Tie your shoes. If you don’t clean up this hell-hole-hurricane-disaster-zone-stinking-landfill-of-a-room, I will clean it for you…and give all your earthly possessions to homeless Brazilian Pygmies who don’t have bedazzled password journals. I think … Continue reading

The Lactation Consultant from the Black Lagoon

lactation consultant from the black lagoon

There is nothing quite like breastfeeding to make a new mom feel like a complete failure at the most important job she will ever have. Scratch that. There is something else: a lactation consultant. Now before anyone objects, let me … Continue reading